I haven't been posting anything on here in a long while, but I'm currently working on one so hopefully I'll be posting it up before the end of summer break.

For: violinsweetie
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"1, 2, 3... okay, that's a wrap for today! Good work everyone!"

Kim Li-Na was one of Korea's top trapeze artists; she was the leading lady of Firebird Acrobatics and was very well-known throughout the country. She was always focused 120% when she practiced for a show or even performed...
RING! "Hello?" But there was one exception... "Yunho! What's up?"

Jung Yunho and Li-Na had been close friends for a long while, having taken dance classes together since they were young. And as the years went by, Li-Na began to notice that her feelings for him had grown from nothing but friends to a sincere crush; it was hard for her to control her feelings, but she tried hard to keep it together. It'd already been 3 years since she'd been holding back on her crush for Yunho. She told herself she would continue keep her focus on work since she knew he did not hold the same feelings for her. Besides, he was too busy doing other things, like being TVXQ's leader, so even if they were to be "together," he wouldn't have any time for her. And now that Yunho was a big rising star all over Asia,  his schedule got busier and busier, which would mean more listening to him talk about his upcoming work whenever he started something new, like his casting for an upcoming drama, one which he was going to be spending lots of time with the oh-so-gorgeous Go Ara.

Li-Na couldn't deny that she was jealous of the fact that Go Ara was constantly going to be shooting scenes with Yunho, but she knew she had no choice but to let it go and congratulate him. His voice was filled with joy when he was on the phone with her, and she couldn't just shoot him down just because she was torn apart from the news. Who was she to judge him anyway?

Though Li-Na was not the type to let anything throw her off guard, this news about Yunho being around with another girl certainly was one big deal that she could not concentrate on her own performances. Because she was so heavily impacted by it all as the drama progressed, it was all she could really think about, and that was the very last thing she thought about before she fell to her death after missing the trapeze when doing her maneuver at her live show, Romeo and Juliet. Everyone there, especially her partner, was shocked by the sight for she had fallen from many feet above after the faulty safety set was not able to hold her up.

The news about Li-Na's death soon spread and that was when Yunho had heard about it; he couldn't believe it, no, he didn't want to believe it. He knew how much performing was important to her and also knew that she allowed nothing to distract her, but this tragedy had happened. He had heard from the members of the acrobatics that she seemed tense during practice, and it probably was one cause of her death. Li-Na always pulled herself together even in the toughest of times, but what was it that made her this way?

After attending the funeral, Yunho was told that Li-Na's things were going to be taken out of her apartment by her family, so he decided to help out, wanting to get a chance to say his last goodbye. He looked around her room, recollecting all the memories he had had with her. Then, examining her desk, Yunho found what seemed to look like a journal that he remembered she always had with her wherever she went; he knew she would have chopped him up into pieces if she figured out he looked inside of it, but he was so curious to what she actually wrote inside of it. And boy, was he in for a surprise...

The moment Yunho opened the diary, he saw that she was writing letters to...him; it had content about what they did whenever they talked or hung out as well as her true feelings about everything, from her crush on him to how she felt about him filming the drama with Go Ara. It was quite a shock since it was so unexpected, and he began to tear up  as he hated himself for not knowing this earlier.

"It's all my fault," he told himself, and he couldn't and didn't want to forgive himself for what had happened to her ever...

Then a year passed....

Even after a year, Yunho was still blaming himself for Li-Na's death. The thoughts just kept roaming through his head, and they just wouldn't leave. His fellow TVXQ members were worried about him because he was not himself anymore. They knew he was still having a hard time letting Li-Na go, and were even more worried  that he was holding all his true emotions in, not wanting to be a burden to the other 4 or their fans. It was as if nothing was going on, even though it was hurting him on the inside.

Then one day, after promotions were over, all 5 members were given a break from their schedules so they could get some rest. While the other members went out of the dorm to roam as they please, Yunho decided to stay back in the dorm to get the sleep he was unable to get during his busy schedule. But his sleep was cut short when he heard a loud noise coming from outside the room. He slowly walked out, still exhausted, and he heard humming from the kitchen. And when he got closer, he was surprised to see a female figure in front of him!

Shocked but tired, Yunho was unable to make a sound, and the person in front of him turned before he could do or say anything. But the face he saw was the last face he expected to see. It was Li-Na. Yunho rubbed his eyes a few times, thinking he was seeing images, but Li-Na was still there smiling at the now more pale Yunho as if nothing was wrong.

"You awake?" Li-Na asked as she approached him to touch his forehead. "How's your fever?"

Fever? What fever? Confused, Yunho tried to process what was going on, and he remembered that just a couple months before Li-Na died, he was struck with pneumonia and a high fever. It was all thanks to Li-Na that he was able to get better since she was the one taking care of him all throughout his sickness.

But wait, does this mean he went back in time? That was basically the only explanation he had to why Li-Na was standing before him at that very moment, and this meant that he was now able to start over and prevent her from ever going through what he made her go through the first time. He only had a couple months to make everything better or he would have to consequently lose her again; he wasn't going to allow that to happen a second time.

After a while under Li-Na's care, Yunho felt better (again), and he was ready to go on set for his drama. But as he was getting dressed to leave, he had a a sense that he'd gone through this moment before....he had; it hit him right in the face. He remembered that he did the same exact thing when he got better the first time; he left Li-Na in the dorm alone the moment he felt better, even after she asked him to stay back with her just for the day. Thinking back, he didn't feel comfortable leaving because he couldn't bare to see that disappointed look on her face again.

When Yunho took a peek outside to the living room, Li-Na was not where he expected her to be. From what he remembered, she was supposed to be sitting on the couch waiting for him to get up, but she was actually in the kitchen cook food.

"What are you cooking?" he asked her.

"Oh, just a little something for you before I go."

"Go? Wait, you're leaving me here...in the dorm...alone?"

"What are you talking about? Aren't you feeling better? You should be getting ready to go back to your shoot; you were so excited to be going back anyway."

"But...but.."

"But what? All of a sudden you don't want to go? What's wrong with you? You okay?"

This was not the Li-Na he remembered.

--------Flashback:----------------


"Do you have to go? Can't you stay behind? You...need more rest."


"Sorry Li-Na. This shoot is very important; it's one of my bigger gigs. But I promise I'll make it up to you soon."


"Promise?"


"I promise. I'll call you later tonight, okay?"


-------End of flashback-----------


Yunho never gave anything back to her; he didn't make it up to her, and he broke his promise. He couldn't believe how selfish and ignorant he was, but along with that, he couldn't believe Li-Na's completely different attitude. He now, in a way, understood how she would've felt when he responded to her in a way she didn't expect him to; he was not happy at all by Li-Na's response to him leaving. Yunho watched Li-Na as she pushed him out the door, forcing him to leave so he wouldn't be late, and off he went for his drama for the rest of the day.

Arriving at the dorm after his schedules were over, Yunho was extremely exhausted. Though he had already gone through this before (having gone back in time and all), he was as tired as ever. But this was a time to complaining when there were bigger problems going through his mind: Li-Na. He was still confused about the fact that she was so nonchalant about everything as if she really didn't care; she acted a little TOO chill for his liking. He was so iffy about what happened that morning that he immediately called Li-Na to see if he could figure out what was going on with her.

She was bound to pick up the phone because she always did...

she always did...

"...she always did," Yunho said to himself and closed his phone.

Li-Na did so much for Yunho, but all he did was turn her down; he had been such a bad friend to her all along and didn't realize this until now. Was he using her as his safety place when he felt like there was nobody ealse to turn to? Because she always was there to listen? Was that really it or...? He was so unsure about his feelings toward her at this point. How did he truly feel about her?

"Hey Changmin," Yunho said as he heard the younger member enter their room, "what would it mean if you were to keep thinking about a certain person, and... there would be that feeling of emptiness when she were to tell you to go when you wanted to stay. Yunho did not realize what he was saying as he was saying them aloud; all he could really think about was what Li-Na told him earlier before she forced him out of the dorm.

"Hyung, I don't understand what you're saying. What do you mean go? Go where?"

"Huh? What do you mean go?"

"You just said that. Is there someone you keep thinking about? If there is, doesn't that mean you like that person? Who is it? Someone I know???"

"Oh...is that what it is? Ah... I'm tired. You should go to bed. Good night!" And Yunho tucked himself in, facing the wall as Changmin stared at the leader with confusion. Yunho didn't want to embarrass himself in front of Changmin, so he decided it would be best to just cut the conversation short by pretending to go to bed early.

"Whatever hyung," Changmin replied with a tired voice after giving up on getting an explanation from Yunho, then he went to bed as well.

Though Yunho almost gave himself away, he was glad to have had that conversation with Changmin. Maybe he really did like Li-Na, he thought as he slowly fell asleep. In order to fully understand what his feelings were, he decided to give it some time and, most importantly, spend more time with her. But every time he tried to spend some quality time with her, it would seem as if she wanted to distance herself from him; she just wanted him to leave to go to his next schedule.

Li-Na's sudden change in behavior not only was a huge disappointment to Yunho, it soon built up his frustration toward her that he exploded. He called Li-Na over to the dorm when the other TVXQ members weren't around, and the moment she asked why he was so tense, he started his ramble. But what he didn't know was that he had news coming his way as well.

"I don't get it. One moment you're like this and the next time I see you, you act like a totally different person. What do you want me to do?!"

"What are you talking about? Are you okay, Yunho?"

"I'm okay, are you? Why are you like this? You're confusing me!"

"Did I do something wrong? I'm sor..."

"Don't apologize," Yunho replied with a sigh as he saw Li-Na look at him as if she had committed a crime, "it's not your fault. It's just that...Li-Na, you have to tell me the truth.."

"About what?"

"D..d..do you...like me?"

And without hesitation, Li-Na replied, "Of course I do! Is that even a question? You're my best friend."

"No. Li-Na, I.."

"Yunho," Li-Na interrupted. She knew exactly what he was going to say and knew that she shouldn't allow this situation to go any further. "I have to tell you something. You probably won't believe me, but this is all a dream, and you're going to be waking up from all this real soon."

"What? You're joking, right?"

"Yunho. How could I even be here? I died, remember? I know it all sounds crazy, but everything I'm telling you is true. I know you saw my journal, and you've been pushing yourself down for too long. You have to stop doing this to yourself and continue to fulfill your dreams; move on with your life, and stop thinking it's your fault because it's not."

"But it is my fault. If I knew, you wouldn't be like this."

"Stop it! It's not your fault! I'm happy here. Isn't that all that matters? I shouldn't have allowed myself to let some drama affect me this way, but it did. And now it's over, so for me, just move on and be happy for yourself. That's what's best for the both of us. Besides, you can never get rid of me because I'll be watching your every move; I'll always be by your side no matter what. Just promise me you'll be happy."

"Li-Na.."

"Just promise me this one thing.."

"Okay, I promise."

"Like I said, it's not your fault; it was just my time to go. I'm happy, so you should be too. Be..oh! It's time for me to go now. There are people who need me more than I do right now, and they are waiting for you at this very moment. You should get back to them.. Yunho, I'll really miss you. Good bye..."

"Where are you going? Li-Na!!" Yunho yelled as he watched her turn her back towards him and faded away.
--------------------------------

"Li-Na...Li-Na.."

"Hyung, are you okay? You awake?"

Yunho slowly opened his eyes and saw his members staring down at him as if they'd seen a ghost, but he was the one seeing ghosts. They were all so pale as if they hadn't rested in days. He finally looked around at his environment and realized that he was inside a hospital room.

"What am I doing here?" Yunho asked, confused.

"You don't remember?! You  fainted in the living room! I told you..."

"Jaejoong hyung, calm down. He needs peace and quiet. Yunho hyung, we found you fainted in the dorm so we took you here. You've been unconscious for a couple days already. What happened?"

"How many times do I have to tell you to take care of yourself, Yunho?!"

"Hyung,...let's just let him rest," Changmin said then turned to Yunho. "We'll be outside, so call us if you need anything."

As Yunho saw the other members leave the room, he felt tears forming. It was really all a dream, and Li-Na was really not going to come back into his life. At the thought of this, he couldn't help but miss her even more, but he was not going to sulk around any longer. He promised her that he was going to be happy, and he didn't want to break a promise with her again. If him moving on was going to make her feel at peace, then he was going to do just that for her. Anything for Li-Na.

Yunho wiped away his tears and toughened up as he promised himself he would live on with his life with an optimistic attitude and live the rest of his life the way Li-Na would want him to. He was going to live life to his fullest until the day he would reunite with Li-Na...

In Heaven.

Plot: A top idol, diagnosed with a tumor in his lungs. Lonely and afraid he runs away. There he meets an angel, there he felt inspired to sing one last song to the world. My Angel, he calls it.
Characters: Key (Kim Kibum) & Lee Eunsook (fictional)
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I do not own any of the characters; only the storyline.
Plot credits go to Midnight Illusions
This is a challenge made by Midnight Illusions @ midnight-illusionsx.blogspot.com
Come check out the site when you have the time!
______________________________________


"Key! Key!" The crowd was going crazy even when I felt like I was making many mistakes. I was glad to see that my fans were cheering me on no matter what, but I felt that this concert was going to be the first and last one that I was ever going to hold. I knew that I didn't have a lot of time to live, so I decided to give up on continuing my career as a singer to just live the rest of my life as a normal citizen. It was going to be hard, but I wanted to run away from it all.


After various arguments with the company I worked under, I eventually was allowed to drop my contract; I was now free. They told me that I could come back whenever I wanted to, but I didn't think that was going to ever happen. It was all going to be new to me again, life without stardom, but I knew I had to get used to it. It was definitely heartbreaking to see fans make comments about their feelings toward my decision; I didn't like disappointing them. But it had to be done; I was now officially back to being plain old me, Kim Kibum.


I spent the first few days just lounging around at home. I was going to move back in with my parents, but the company insisted that I stay at the dorm, so I accepted. It was quite boring staying at home all day, but I liked the feeling of having time just to myself. I read the letters that my fans sent me, and I came across a very strange gift from, I believe, a fan. It was a purple envelope, and inside it was a picture of a little boy and girl standing side-by-side each other. I took a close look at it and realized that the boy in the picture looked a lot like me, but who was the little girl?


I didn't have much memory of my childhood before I was adopted into the lovely family I have today. I never asked my parents about what my family was like or even anything close to it because I knew it would be a burden to them; I didn't even want to think of myself as a foster child. My parents took care of me well and treated me like I was their own family member, so I was going to do the same back. I may not have had any siblings, but I had fun being an only child at times. But that picture I received from that stranger made me think that I may have had a sibling before. The thing is that nobody knew that I was adopted..unless it was from a friend of mine playing a prank on me or maybe it was from my parents (but why would they leave it anonymous?). I needed to know what this was all about.


I went to my parents right away and asked if they knew anything about the picture. It was obvious that they were shocked as well, but I wasn't sure if it was because they knew about it or if it was because they've never seen it before.


"Kibum, where did you get this?" my mom asked calmly.


"Someone sent this to me; it was in the mail. Who is this girl?"


My mom took another look at the picture while answering, "Kibum, you know you'll always be our one and only son, and nothing will change that. I don't know who this is, but I'm thinking it may be your sister. We weren't told much of your family, so I'm sorry I can't help you."


This got me thinking; why would anyone send me a picture like this? At first I thought it was a threat, but there was no note of any sort, so I was confused. It made me very curious, but I just decided to let it go. Well, that was only until I received another strange picture. It was inside that same purple envelope from before, but this time it was a different picture (but of the same people). At this point, I was getting a bit frightened, but I couldn't do anything about it since there was no name of anything written on the envelope. It was all so strange.


This continued for days, so I could not ignore any of this. This continuous sending of pictures got me to wonder why this person was sending these to me now and not before, when I was still part of the entertainment industry. I was still quite skeptical about it all; it just did not make any sense to me! I would think that if someone wanted me to know about him/her (in this case 'her'), he/she would try to talk to me in person, but I guess not.


One day, while I was getting ready to make some lunch, I heard the doorbell ring, and there was a girl standing outside. Normally I wouldn't open the door for strangers in order to be cautious about fans or antifans, but I did anyway. And surprisingly, this person was going to give me answers I was looking for these past strange days.


"Kibum, I finally found you. Did you get my pictures?"


"Pictures? Who are you?"


"You don't remember me, do you? It's me, Eunsook! We were friends when we were little, and we were even in the same class in school! See?" And she showed me the yearbook with our photos in it. She was the girl in all the pictures that were sent to me! "You always told me to call you Oppa just because you were a few months older than me..."


I still had no memory of all this since we were so young then, which made me want to know more. I let her enter my house so she could tell me more about my childhood, and she seemed to know a few things. All she told me was that I lived with my dad and my sister when I was younger, but she didn't seem to know anything else, not even my sister's name... I felt awkward being with Eunsook, but I still needed her since she was my only source of bringing back my memory. And because I wanted to know more about myself, we ended up seeing each other often, and eventually, we became quick friends (again, I guess.). We ended up meeting so much that even my parents knew about her. It was weird at first, but I felt comfortable being around her later. We had so much in common, and it was nice to know that there was someone I could talk to freely even though she knew that I was once a singer. I just had so much talking to her overall. She even made me forget that I was even sick at times...


--------
A few months back:


"Kibum," the doctor said, we found a problem; I'm sorry to say this but you have a tumor in your lungs."


"Is there anything you could so?"


"I'm sorry. I'm afraid it's a little too late; it's too risky to go through surgery now. Even with it, there's only a 20% of surviving. We'll also need to find donors."


"How long will I be able to live then?"


"At most you'll have a year...I'm sorry."
-----------


I tried my absolute best to not show any signs of me being sick; I didn't like people worrying about me. I had a hard time breathing sometimes, but I didn't want people to see this side of me. The doctor said that if there were a donor willing to donate their lungs after death, I would be able to do the surgery if I still wanted to, but like before, there was no guarantee that I would survive. I needed to do some more thinking about what to do.


Since I knew I didn't have much time left, I knew that I had to enjoy the rest of the time I had, so I decided to go on a trip with my family. My parents were enjoying themselves; we were all having so much fun until my breathing problems started coming back. I tried covering it up by telling them that I was okay, but it was no use.


The next thing I knew, I was at the hospital bed with my mom crying on one side and my dad watching over me on the other. As I opened my eyes, I felt a warm hand covering my own; I haven't felt warmth like this in such a long time, and I liked it.


"Kibum, why didn't you tell us?" my dad said quietly while grasping my hand. At the moment, it hit me; they found out about everything.


As I saw my dad trying hard to hold in his tears, I felt guilty. I couldn't say anything to him for an apology was not enough to wipe my parents' tears away.


After a day or two, I was able to leave the hospital and finally go home. But instead of going to my dorm, I officially moved back in with my parents; they wanted to watch over me at all times in order to make sure I was doing okay. It was great to be back home again, but I felt like I was being a big burden to both my parents and I didn't like the feeling. Even though the tumor was a problem, I wanted to act like there was nothing wrong with me; I just wanted to be my optimistic self again. In order to achieve this, I decided to make use of myself. While looking for something to do at home, I discovered a book on the kitchen table; it was called My Angel by Lee Eunsook.


"Lee Eunsook?" It was the same name as my friend, Eunsook, but it couldn't be her; I just thought of it as a coincidence. I went into the living room and started reading the book. It was about a girl who was on a search to find her lost twin brother. They were separated when they were very little. It was a very sad story, but it was so well-written that I could not stop reading it. I always had the book with me until one day, the book went missing. When I asked my mom about it, she told me she hasn't seen it. It was weird, but that didn't matter much to me since my top priority was to finish the book. And because I wanted to read it badly, I headed off to the bookstore where I bumped into Eunsook. I haven't seen her since the day before I left for the family trip, so I asked her to join me for a cup of coffee.


"Kibum, how have you been? You look really pale; are you okay?"


"Yeah, I'm okay. Don't worry about me." She seemed a bit worried so I felt like I needed to quickly change the subject. "So, are you here here to find a book?"


"Yeah, I just dropped by to pick it up. You?"


"I've been reading this book, but it went missing so I came to buy a copy. It's really good!"


"Oh? What's it called?"


"It's called My Angel. Which reminds me, is this your book? It was written by Lee Eunsook, so I was curious."


"Yeah..I wrote it. How'd you get a copy?"


"There was one at home, but I don't know where it went now. It's really strange; I had it one day then the next day, it's gone. Hey, the book is really good though; I loved your use of details."


"Thanks..."


"Are you okay, Eunsook? You seem a bit tensed."


"I..I have an appointment later. I'll see you later; good luck finding the book!" And she walked off before I could say goodbye.


All I could think about was the book, so as I saw her exit the building, I quickly went over to the shelves, found the book, and went off to purchase it. Then I quickly went home to finish reading the rest of the story. But when I entered my house, I saw that my room was being rearranged due to it not being used to after I moved out. I just decided to go read the book in my parents' room instead, so I could read it in peace. It was nice to finally have my own copy, and because it was a special book written by one of my closest friend, I decided to write my name in it and perhaps give it a bright homemade book cover so I clearly knew it was MY copy. I always made my own so it would be one of a kind.


I went over to the cupboard where all the utensils were, and I discovered something behind it; it must have fallen while my mom was cleaning, so I decided to take it out. When I reached back to grab the object, I felt something that felt like a book. I pulled it out to reveal its cover, and it was the copy of My Angel that I had been looking for.


"Here it is! I wonder how it got here. Mom, I found the book!" I walked over to show her.


"What did you find?"


"The book. I'm going to return.."


"No! Please give me that copy; you just keep the one you bought."


"Why do we need two copies of the same book though?"


"This is actually...Eunsook's copy! I have to return it back to her." Then she grabbed the book and went back to cleaning.


"Oh, okay. I'm going to finish this in you and dad's room then." She was too busy cleaning that she didn't answer.


I felt like there was something going on, but at the same time, maybe I was thinking too much about it. It seemed like people were avoiding me all of a sudden, but that couldn't be; they wouldn't do that.
I didn't really want to think about it though; I just had to finish the book.


It wasn't until a couple hours later when I finished the entire book but for some reason, even after finishing it, it didn't feel like I finished it. The ending didn't seem like an ending to me; it felt so unfinished. I was hoping for the girl to eventually find her brother toward the end of the book, but that did not happen at all. Her brother never appeared in the book, and the girl just continued to live her life without him; I was so disappointed with the ending, and I needed to complain about it to the author herself.


After quickly dialing Eunsook's number, I waited for someone to pick up. But I was surprised when I was answered by a few sniffles on the other line along with a nasally voice.


"Hello?" the person answered.


"Eunsook?"


"Kibum!! What's up?!"


"Are you sick?"


"It's nothing; I just have allergies, that's all..."


"Oh. Hey, I need to discuss something with you. Can I go over? I could also bring you some medicine while I'm on my way."


"NO! I mean, it's okay. I'll just go over...if it's okay."


"Of course! When has it not been okay? Come over soon!" And Eunsook came over a few minutes later; I grabbed her arm and dragged her to the backyard.


"Kibum, is something the matter?"


"First, are you sure you're okay? You sounded terrible on the phone, and your face is so red. You're sure you aren't sick or anything?"


She giggled a bit. "Nah, I'm okay. I told you, it's just allergies. You worry too much..now, tell me!"


"I have a complaint for you. Why does your book end that way?! Where's her brother? I thought she would find him!"


"Well," she answered softly, "she probably did, but.."


"Then where's the happy ending?"


"Kibum, you and your happy endings. Not all stories end happily, you know. And this is my story, not yours. I can do whatever I want with it, whether you like it or not."


"Okay, fine! But I still think you should have made it happy." And she just laughed.


I invited her to stay for dinner, so she ended up staying over a lot longer than I had originally planned but nobody minded. We were having so much fun, but for the very first time, I saw something other than joy in Eunsook's eyes; the problem was that I didn't know what it was. Right when I was about to ask her if anything was wrong, I started feeling pain when I tried to reach over to her. I wanted to hold in the pain since Eunsook didn't know about the tumor, but it was just too painful that I collapsed onto the floor. Then I started had trouble breathing, and the room turned black all of a sudden.


Kibum...


Kibum... Oppa...


I'm sorry...


--------------------


I must have been asleep in the hospital for a very long time because I felt very lightheaded when I woke up , and people were attempting to call the doctor, informing him that I was awake. I opened my eyes to see a crowd of people surrounding me, and I was glad to see them. I gave them a faint smile, trying to show that I was okay. Then I remembered something...what were those voices? And that dream; what was that? And I realized that there was someone missing.


I looked around and realized that Eunsook wasn't here. I tried hard to speak, but it was just too hard for me since I lost a lot of energy. Something wasn't right; I didn't feel like myself, and the pain I had was gone. Also, why were there all of a sudden so many people here when I've been to the hospital numerous times already? Something was going on, and I wanted to know what.


I tried to get up but my parents told me to stay put for a while. Their face expressions seemed to be happy, but they still seemed worried. I tried speaking again, but it was still just too hard for me. But I really needed to know where Eunsook was.


-------------------------
Kibum's Dream (flashback)


"Kibum...I'm sorry..." There was a figure in the distance but because of the darkness, I couldn't see who it was.


"Who are you?"


"I'm sorry..."


"Why do you keep apologizing to me? Who are you?" Then a glow of light was blinding me, so I turned my head. And when I turned back around to see who it was, there stood Eunsook.


I tried getting closer, but she turned her back towards me while stepping into a portal of light.


"Eunsook! Where are you going? Let me come with you; don't leave me..I'm scared."


"Don't be, Kibum. I'll always be there for you; I'll protect you." And she disappeared as she stepped through the slowly fading light.


------------------------------


"Kibum! What do you think you're doing?" Nobody was letting me do anything.


"I need to find her! Where is she?!" I was finally able to get the strength to speak.


As I was struggling to leave, I felt a hand let go of my shoulder. I looked up and saw my mom cry once again.


"Go...you can look all you want; go find her!"


"Mom, I.."


"Kibum." It was now my dad's turn. "Eunsook gone, and she's not coming back."


"Where is she?"


"She's far, far away. And she's not going to ever be back." I couldn't believe what I was hearing; this couldn't be real.


"But she promised..she did," I said to myself.


"She may not be here right now, but she hasn't broken her promise. Once you heal, you'll be able to see your sister."


"How'd you know?" Then my dad quickly changed the subject.


"By the way, are you able to breathe okay? I'm glad your surgery was a success." I decided to actually go with the surgery when I had the chance, even after knowing that there was a high chance of failure. I was glad the surgical process was a success too.


After I was fully healed, I was out of the hospital for good; I felt like a whole new person, being able to breathe normally for the first time in so long. But it was disappointing to know that Eunsook was not there with me to see my healthy self. She even promised to be there for me..


While putting my right hand over where my lungs were located, I said to myself, "Eunsook, where are you?"


"You ready to go?" My parents promised me to take me to see my sister; it turned out she was actually my twin. I had no clue where we were going exactly but I was excited anyway by the fact that I was going to see my sister for the very first time. My parents and I were wearing the nicest clothes we had and were on our way. At first, I just was unable to control my happiness; I was a little too jumpy. But as we got closer to the destination, my smile slowly faded away; we were heading toward a cemetery.


"Dad, mom. Why are we here?"


"Kibum, we need to tell you the truth..you'll just have to see for yourself. But before that, just know that we did this to protect you," my mom said with a sigh. I was a bit befuddled, but I just followed them anyway.


My parents stopped in front of a small tree, and on the tree trunk, there was a piece of wood hanging from it. Written on it was a name. When my parents directed me toward it, I took a closer look at the name, and I couldn't believe what I was reading. I fell on the floor; I couldn't feel my legs anymore at the moment.


"Kibum, we're so sorry."


"How long did you know this? Why didn't you tell me?" To make sure I read the name right, I checked the piece of wood again, and there it was, written in block letters: Lee Eunsook. She was buried at that spot, and I didn't even know this until now, a few days after the funeral.


"We did this to protect you; Eunsook wanted this too. Do you remember the first day you met her? She came to us that same day.. we were going to tell you but she pleaded not to," my mom began.


Then my dad added, "Son, she was sick; she wouldn't have wanted you to worry about her when you were too. You know she loves you, and she'll do nothing to hurt you. She made a big sacrifice just for you; the donor...was actually Eunsook. She cut her life short just for you; I'm sorry. We didn't even know this either until her body was discovered at her house."


This could not be true; I wanted this all to be just a dream, but no matter what I did, I just couldn't wake up from all this. So this is why she was never going to come back..Is this what you really wanted, Eunsook?


I put my hands over my face, trying not to show my tears but it was just too difficult for me to take it in. Eunsook, my own sister, was there by my side this whole time, and was I once able to call her my sister? No.


Realizing what I had done to Eunsook, I reached for the tree; I missed her. And while I was staring at the tree, my mom handed me something.


"It's Eunsook's copy of My Angel; she wanted me to give this to you. I think it's finally time for you to know why I couldn't show you this before. Flip to the very back of the book, and you'll see." And my parents left to go to the car, telling me I should have some time alone with Eunsook.


Before anything, I had to check what my mom was talking about, so I flipped the book to the very back. It was the ending of the story handwritten by Eunsook herself. And slipped in the middle of the book was a letter from her as well.
======


Kibum (oppa):


First of all, I want to say I'm sorry for lying to you; I never meant to hurt you or anything. In order to make it up to you, I even finished the story with a happy ending, just like you wanted. I hope you like it.


Kibum, to tell you the truth, this story was, in reality, all about my quest to find you after we were separated from the foster home we were sent to due to our dad passing away. That is mainly why I dedicated the book to you. I have a confession to make: I've been watching you from afar ever since I found out about where you lived. I didn't want to frighten you, so I never approached you before. But I'm really glad I did before it was too late.


I won't make this too long because I know writing on paper is just not enough to tell you how much I'm sorry for everything and how much I love you with all my heart.


Thank you for everything, and now that you're all better, go back to being Onew and fulfill your dreams. Don't give up! That's my only wish.


Oppa, I'll never forget you. I love you, and I'm really going to miss you.


Love, Eunsook.
P.S. I finally called you Oppa! (:
=========


It hurt me to know that Eunsook went through so much just to find me. I quickly read the ending of the story, and it made me cry.


And the two lived happily ever after...


It was the ending I was looking for, but it saddened me to know that only the ending was the unrealistic part of the entire story; Eunsook and I were separated once again...


In order to make up for what Eunsook had done for me, I decided to go back to my company to sign a contract with them once again. And months later, I was able to start anew with promotions again. My goal from then on was to be able to dedicate a song to Eunsook, so she could be able to hear me from wherever she was.
----------------------------------


A couple years later...


"Key! Key!" The crowd, my fans; they were all cheering for me.


This moment...I've felt it before several years ago, when I held my very first concert. I was again a bit nervous, but this time, I was ready for anything. There was nothing to be afraid of when Eunsook was there with me. I stood on the stage, getting ready to present the last song.


"Thank you for coming to my s...first concert, "Revival." Now it's time for me to introduce to you a song that I've never introduced to the public. I composed this song myself, and I dedicate it to the ones I love. I hope you enjoy it.
===============


Heaven knows how much pain we've been through.
But even with all this pain, you've kept me alive.
Your smile, you voice; they have me happiness.


Even though you can't see me, just know
That I'm not far away.
I may be watching from afar, but know that
I'll always be right next to you.
....


Whenever I close my eyes, I see you.
The glow surrounding you; you're an angel from above.
The smile on your face
Just doesn't seem to disappear.
It gives me happiness to know that you are near.
...


You are my angel, the one that revives me.
==================


I looked up at the where all the fans were located while I sang the song, hoping to find the glow of light I saw in my dream years back, the light that would show me where Eunsook was.


Eunsook, I hope you like it. It's called 'My Angel,' and I wrote it just for you. Thank you for everything. I love you, my sister.


That was my first time calling Eunsook my sister, and it made me grin, thinking that one day we would be able to reunite and become a family once again. And just like the ending of her story, My Angel, we'll live "happily ever after."

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